Maddie: At my old school, we had a strict dress code, and no—I don't play any sports; I hate sports.
Maddie: Like, what has humanity come to as we sit around, watching dudes ram into each other and get brain injuries?
Maddie: Come on, put some elbow grease into it! Get your Cinderell-y on.
Wes: My Cinderell-y?
Maddie: I made-out with Wes, and Trish had a fantasy baby…and I made-out with Wes. Did I actually make-out with Wes? Meanwhile, Zach is my boyfriend. Wes' mouth tasted like something really good…what is it? It's, like, familiar…Chapstick? Cinnamon…oh, I think it's bubblegum.
Maddie: And you know what they say: It's progress, not perfection.
Vern: Does soy milk go bad?
Craig: Sudden interest in dairy?
Vern: Cynthia's coming over with cake leftovers.
Craig: Cynthia? Uh, leftovers?
Vern: Yeah, her wedding cake-tasting. Paul's gone paleo before the wedding, so he's only taking one bite of each.
Craig: Oh, okay…
Vern: Please, don't even get me started…some kind of janky philosophy about the diet cavemen used to eat when we were all hunter-gatherers, or whatever. His masochism is my game.
Vern: Carrot cake at a wedding is perverse! Nobody deserves raisins at a wedding—not even your dumb in-laws. Fondant? Please. If I'm gonna put on a suit and dance the Electric Slide with your creepy cousins, then I want buttercream.
Cynthia: I kissed someone.
Vern: Huh-what?
Cynthia: Someone who is not Paul.
Vern: Holy Gold Leaf Tahitian Vanilla Bean, what the hell are you talking about?
Vern: What are these girls doing in here?! How did they even break that thing?
Craig: Oh, I don't know. It's always something, especially with the girls. If it's not the sink, it's hair everywhere—I mean, there is hair everywhere.
Maddie: Yes! I'm talking about a romantic relationship that's not right, but not wrong, either.
Cynthia: Well, uh…sometimes, relationships can be, um, complicated, and just because a relationship isn't right, uh, you might think that it makes you the bad person, and…uh, maybe it does—maybe—and maybe if it isn't right, then it's wrong—very wrong and very irresponsible! But then again, maybe a relationship is too strong of a word, and—but if it feels so right, then is it so wrong? Right?
Maddie: What the hell are you talking about?
Cynthia: What are you talking about?
Maddie: I am talking about Zach; I just didn't wanna say, because you know him.
Cynthia: Oh! Oh, Maddie…no—no, no, no—no, you can say whatever you wanna say in here. No judgment.
Vern (about Craig): I didn't realise he'd have the tolerance of an eighty-five-pound ballerina.
Wes: Do you think we should take him home?
Vern: Nah, leave him alone; he's havin' fun.
Craig: Yeah, Cynthia, don't say anything. I, uh, I'm just gonna say what I need to say, because i-it's driving me crazy. Look, I-I'll just say, then you'll have it. Um… Cynthia, I don't want what happened to be the last and only time—I don't. I-I would like tens—or hundreds—more occurrences like that, because respectfully, Cynthia, th-the thing is, you are…you're incredible—you are. I mean, I-I think you're fascinating, and complex, and so damn sexy, and I just—I don't understand you—yet—and-and I want to. I-I-I want to understand you. I just-I just hope some-somehow, you will let me.
Maddie: Every friendship has an origin story, but…some aren't what they seem. Enemies can be friends in disguise, and vice-versa. People can surprise you—with secrets, with lies, with the truth. People can surprise you with love…and some relationships are ever-evolving; you don't know exactly where they'll end up. That's part of the fun.

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Episode quotes
Season 1 Blackout  •  The Art of the Deal  •  Surrender  •  Parties Without Borders  •  My Loose Thread  •  Heaven Backwards  •  Sick as Our Secrets  •  The Weaklings  •  Your Side of the Street  •  (Be)Coming Clean  • 
Recovery Road: Episode quotes